searching for support after aborted surgery

Stressing now is 100% normal😊 it's an operation and it's scary! I was a total mess before I had mine! I am definitely a stress head myself, always manage to worry about the worst case😊
Just want you to know you're def not alone in that xx

Hey LMW,
thanks so much for your reply.
Yes, I agree, there's a lot we don't know... And what a shame bindibuzz hasn't checked back in. I wonder how many have read it and worried.

I do sound a bit like a stress head... Normally I'm not. I think it's because this forum is my outlet for letting it out. I appreciate your kind response and for helping me get focused on what I can control. Funnily, that's what my husband would prob have tried to say too.... But I havent told him about this.

I have pretty much been 100% (is that an oxymoron haha) for the last 4 days.... With the few little slip ups only equaling maybe 1/2 cup of extras. I don't think its worth much.... But you know fear and paranoia can take over.... Especially when you're already a bit of a scaredy cat.
Thanks
Ginger x

Okay Ginger, here's the thing...no one can guarantee a sucess, could this happen to you...yes...will it happen to you...probably not! There is no way of knowing what actually caused this particular case, there are many factors. You are a few days out from surgery, worrying about the possible outcomes you can't control is just an added stress.

My advice is to try and use this as a bit of a lesson, use it to focus on doing exactly what you need to do 100% in the next couple of days and after the surgery! Don't beat youself up about what's past just give yourself the best chance to suceed by focusing on what you can control now👍 Wishing you all the best for your surgery and I hope the last couple of days aren't too stressful😊

Bindibuzz wrote:

I am so devastated.
I went in for my gastric sleeve yesterday and despite loosing 5kg my liver was huge and they closed me back up and aborted the surgery! I was sent home after just a few hours.
I have not stopped crying. Not only have I failed but I used my super for this and now I wont have the money to have it done again. I have failed myself and my husband and have wasted $20000. Yes I will get some back from medicare for some and what the hospital didnt use BUT there is no way in heavens name I can afford anesthetist fees and theatre fees again.
I just want to crawl in a hole and never come out.
I worried this is going to send into a major negative spiral now. I am destined to be fat with uncontrolled diabetes and high blood pressure. Despite trying my hardest with diet and exercise my weight wont shift and this is why it was suggested i have a sleeve.
I am miserable and feel like a total waste of space, an absolute failure.

Ok, I have just found this topic.... And poor bindibuzz's sad first post.
I wonder how she is going and I wish I knew more details. It happened in May 2015. 
Not knowing all her details.... Makes me nervous, that maybe this will happen to me. I wonder if she followed opti to the T or whether she had a few splurges. I wish I hadn't read it as it makes me doubt myself. 
I've been doing optifast for 12 days so far..... I've lost 4.4kgs as of this morning. Keeping to three opti a day and veges or vege soup ive made. Some days, I haven't even had the veges... As I just havent found a palatable way to cook them. On a few days... I've had a taste of some protein, I'm talking a tiny piece.... Here or there. The size of a teaspoon or two..... Over the two weeks, I've had two double d sugar free buttercandies and maybe two glasses of diet coke.... Oh and I've had two teaspoons of yoghurt... I put in my soup as I made it too spicy.
I am a bit freaked out at the moment and paranoid that bindibuzz's situation will happen to me. Am I being silly? Have a been a bit too free willed with these little tastes? Oh gee.... I don't know what to think? How would I be if I woke up with nothing done?

Ginger x

Hi Bindibuzz,

How are you going? I hope that things have improved a bit🌻 Has your surgeon given you any idea on what your next move could be? Sending you some hugs and wishing you the best.

Bindibuzz,

I am so sorry to hear of this happening to you.  I am wondering what advice your surgeon gave you for the pre-op diet and whether he/she needs to share some of the responsibility here.  If you stuck to your opti-diet but still had a huge liver, did your surgeon not recommend a long enough period on it???  Most people do 2 weeks but many do 5 or 6 weeks on this diet, depending on their surgeon's recommendation.

This may be something you could raise with your surgeon, put the hard word on them, asking why your Opti phase was not longer, and ask them to consider bulk billing all of their fees so that you can have as much as possible to put towards a re-do.  When something like this happens, we can feel so overwhelmed that we don't stand up and push for the best outcome.  Try to be assertive and ask for them to be understanding of your financial circumstances.  

If on the other hand, you have strayed on the diet and know that this is a consequence from this, still don't give up.  Appeal for assistance by asking them if they would consider just charging the medicare fees so that you can reschedule and do it right.  Say you are really committed and then be committed.  Do it in writing if you don't feel you can do it in person.  The worst that can happen is the same as where you are now so every avenue is worth a try, even a bit of grovelling, lol.

Best wishes and please stick around for support,

Hope you have looked into having some counselling, If you don't you have someone you can talk to.  I think this is really important for you right now. 

Its not your fault.  It happens.  One of the girls who was supposed to be sleeved when I was sleeved, also had the same thing happen to her.  Not sure if she's still on this forum, she can probably comment better than I can.

I agree with Bumbles, get full cover PHI and try again in another year. 

Good LUck!

Hugs to you Bindibuzz,   I can sympathise a little at the disappointment and feeling of failure as I went through all the pre-op appointments and optifast diet over 6 months and got to 2 days before having a gastric banding and the surgeon did my endoscopy and said you have barretts osophegus so cant have a band. His solution was to reschedule me with no extra time to research or decide for my self if a gastric bypass was what I wanted. I crashed in a heap as  to him it was simple but to me it was major surgery that I wasn't sure I wanted at that stage. So with my history of calcium deficiencies I canceled the By pass as I didn't want to live with malabsorption issues down the track. He said he wanted to do the bypass to cure my reflux which was causing Barrets Osophagus. I must say here they did refunded me in full - the surgeons amount as I hadn't got to surgery day, but I lost all the other pre op appointment costs.
The outcome of this at this time was I felt I had to live with my weight creeping up and just be happy I felt well.   However 2 years later after an endoscopy to check my Barrets  I was advised by same dr - that I didn't have barretts and I didn't have refux to cause Barrets.    So this really got me confused as to the accuracy of doctors decisions for you as an individual as he didn't check into my past medical history and realise the drastic effects Bypass could have on my Osteoporosis (cause by a long term Para thyroid tumour). Being a nurse I did my own researching and made my own decision what was best me. I did not want malnutrition - just less stomach to reduce the volume of what I ate and be able to eat normal food for the rest of my life.
So Yes I was in a very confused and bad place too until a dear friend encouraged me to talk to some one who had had great success with the sleeve. Due to her support I have researched to get the best Dr and go ahead with a sleeve which my first Doctor will not perform as its irreversible surgery. 
Out of all this I would like to encourage you that sometimes good can come out of something really bad. I now know I'm doing the right thing as a band would not have worked for me in retirement lifestyle. I now have a great doctor and I'm at last in a stress free stage of my life and at peace this is the right op and timeing for me. I now am so greatful the surgery did not go ahead.
I agree its devastating!  BUT thank your surgeon for not proceeding when the surgery was to dangerous - he may have saved your life. Be open and honest with him and as the girls below advised - seek to be builk billed and take time to get your self to the right weight and stronger mind to reschedule. Look into private health - a year is really not too long to wait - I had a 2 1/2 year interval between my failed op and now sleeve date.
Keep on the forums and get councilling if you feel you need to talk it through. I can reassure you - you will come through stronger and your determination will get you there in the end. Please don't beat yourself up - most of us have done that all our lives.
I have fatty liver too and working to reduce it over 6 weeks pre op. Some surgeons want a certain weight loss before surgery can proceed so they ensure your liver is able to be lifted off the stomach. With a longer pre op diet I'm sure your surgery could proceed but I understand its the loss of finances that's devastating.

Hi Bindi

I agree with Totoro, chase the surgeon & hospital to hold the fees for a second surgery in a few months and ask they bill the cancelled surgery to Medicare. Hopefully with your co-morbidities you can get another chance. Also ask your GP for a Medicare plan and engage with a psychologist for a few sessions to help make sense of your feelings and where to from here. You're not a failure xx

Missy

I'm so sorry this happened to you.

The same thing happened to my father - he has a massive hiatus hernia right on top of his stomach that couldn't be fixed laparoscopically. He was also self funded - HOWEVER, the surgeon, hospital and anaesthetist all REFUNDED their fees and simply charged medicare instead, since the operation couldn't be performed. Perhaps you could look into that.

Oh sweetie that is just awful!

Please make sure you have support during this time, dont try and deal with it on your own :(

My only suggestion would be to use whats left to take out PHI, save the gap from what you will get back, wait your 12 months and work your ass off at reducing the size of your liver, consider this as the kick in the pants needed to get motivated, then go back in 12 months and stick it to the man!

I am so devastated.
I went in for my gastric sleeve yesterday and despite loosing 5kg my liver was huge and they closed me back up and aborted the surgery! I was sent home after just a few hours.
I have not stopped crying. Not only have I failed but I used my super for this and now I wont have the money to have it done again. I have failed myself and my husband and have wasted $20000. Yes I will get some back from medicare for some and what the hospital didnt use BUT there is no way in heavens name I can afford anesthetist fees and theatre fees again.
I just want to crawl in a hole and never come out.
I worried this is going to send into a major negative spiral now. I am destined to be fat with uncontrolled diabetes and high blood pressure. Despite trying my hardest with diet and exercise my weight wont shift and this is why it was suggested i have a sleeve.
I am miserable and feel like a total waste of space, an absolute failure.