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 Is age an issue?

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mamaraptor
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mamaraptor

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Number of posts : 249
Location : Melbourne, Australia
Registration date : 2011-11-12

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyFri 13 Jan 2012, 7:50 am

AHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!! love you van xxoo
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vanderaj
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vanderaj

Male
Number of posts : 498
Age : 48
Location : Highton, Victoria
Registration date : 2011-10-09

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyFri 13 Jan 2012, 7:05 am

It's gay only if he's a girl. :)
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mamaraptor
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mamaraptor

Female
Number of posts : 249
Location : Melbourne, Australia
Registration date : 2011-11-12

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 11:45 pm

I love you guys and your honesty! Thank you! I guess I was just curious!

With me, we have known each other for a long time. He is over 18 (yes, I am not a child snatcher - gross!) and we have spent a lot of time getting to know each other. We share common goals, values and beliefs and when we got together just after NY's it was like everything fell into place. It sounds so gay but we complete the best bits of each other! What has been really important to me is shared vision, beliefs and values and we both have agreed direction on the relationship and our values. We are comitted to each other and are looking long term, not just a short fling.

LOVE IS AMAZING! In my opinion, unless someone is under 18, age isn't a factor. There are some people with month age gaps, some with years and some with decades however I truly believe that if they have matured, have concrete goals and visions, are established in their career path and are right for you (and i do mean "right" not just fluffy, post sex, kidding yourself right) then it really doesn't matter.

Love you guys and value your opinions xxoo
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Melinda38
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Melinda38

Female
Number of posts : 441
Age : 45
Location : Gold Coast
Registration date : 2011-09-26

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 10:51 pm

Here here Surfette!!
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Smurfette
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Smurfette

Female
Number of posts : 1272
Location : Western Australia
Registration date : 2010-08-15

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 9:41 pm

If a relationship is solid; [true friends, sole mates, etc]; then age sees no boundaries; and to 'those' in the relationship; will feel no boundaries.
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mac.calder
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mac.calder

Male
Number of posts : 116
Age : 32
Location : Perth, WA
Registration date : 2011-11-08

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 1:05 pm

Well for guys there is the proverbial "Half-your-age-plus-seven" rule - but I don't think there is one for women.

Seriously though - my belief is that love is love - that it involves 2 consenting adults is all that matters really. I have an auntie who's husband is 17 years older than her - been married over 30 years. I have a friend who is months older that his now-ex-wife. Age has far less to do with things than compatibility.
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SassyMummy
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SassyMummy

Female
Number of posts : 271
Age : 33
Location : Qld
Registration date : 2010-08-21

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 11:29 am

I think age gaps tend to matter less the older you get. 10 years for me would matter a lot - that would be a 15-year-old schoolboy and would be pervy and illegal.
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Melinda38
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Melinda38

Female
Number of posts : 441
Age : 45
Location : Gold Coast
Registration date : 2011-09-26

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 10:22 am

My babysitter is 14 yrs older than her husband and I couldn't imagine them not being together. A colleague just told me today she is 7 yrs older than her detective husband.

Seriously if you are happy go with it. Like the others said there is a difference between an 18 male and 38 yr old man. Only you will know if it's right. Enjoy your time and don't worry what others think.

All my ex partners were exactly the same age. Todd on the other hand is 4 yrs older but sometimes I THINK he is 20yrs older!! At the end of the day he is my best friend (probably my only friend lol)

Have fun & relax
Xx
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Kate
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Kate

Female
Number of posts : 2162
Age : 52
Location : Leeton NSW
Registration date : 2011-06-23

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 9:08 am

Personally I have never let age be a deciding factor in anything. Wether it be relationships or friendships. I don't really think about age a lot and I tend to just think everyone is the same age as me. A bit of a simplistic view perhaps but that's just me. We have friends that vary from teenagers to the very elderly. I have a bit of a split opinion and it probably doesn't make much sense but I'll put my bit in anyways. I think to say that ALL 18 year olds are immature (I'm not implying anyone has said this just an example) is a bit of a generalisation and each person should be taken on their own personality and maturity or lack of it. I do think that life is too short to pass up any chance of true happiness and how else do you know if he is the one unless you take a chance. Even if you have had discussions on the seriousness of the relationship or not that doesn't mean that it is going to last. No one can be guaranteed that any relationship will last forever, that's just not realistic. I also think that 18 year old boys love to hang out with their mates and go to the pub and talk cars etc so perhaps it is just a fling in his eyes. (Told you I had a split opinion). Basically I guess what I'm trying to say is go into the relationship with both eyes wide open and don't have to high an expectation and see where it leads. Good luck.
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vanderaj
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vanderaj

Male
Number of posts : 498
Age : 48
Location : Highton, Victoria
Registration date : 2011-10-09

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PostSubject: Enjoy the burrito   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 8:38 am

Everyone deserves to be happy. Do something for you for once rather than doing what everyone else wants you to do.

Society has such a double standard. If a bloke has a young lover, he's a legend and she's a gold digger. If a woman has a younger lover (and not even by much), it'll never work out and you're a sugar momma. Just look at the news coverage of Dick Van Dyke (178 or something like that) getting engaged to a 39 year old. Now compare that to your situation.

If it doesn't work out, at least you enjoyed eating the burrito whilst times were good. Not every relationship is The One, but if it is, you'll never know if you let your friends or family influence you.

Just go have fun :)
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gottarhyme
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gottarhyme

Female
Number of posts : 3826
Age : 58
Location : Riverina
Registration date : 2011-02-22

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 2:50 am

My parents were 16 and 18 when they married and they divorced 30 years later, after Dad had a LOT of affairs. But they were roughly the same age, like you and your hubby, Shelley!

My Mum is only 17 years older than me! ( as you know!) It's not really about YOUTH per se, but the respective ages of teenagers and older adults.
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shelly25
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shelly25

Female
Number of posts : 1776
Age : 42
Location : NSW
Registration date : 2009-11-21

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 2:40 am

It depends on what you want from it verses what he is thinking.Is it just a fling for him? Or you?

are you wanting it to get serious? is he? etc



If you have both talked about where your relationship is heading/seriousness etc and youve factored in his age etc and your both happy then enjoy! No one can predict the future or who stays together/seperates.Ive been with my hubby since I was 14 and he was 16 and Im now 34!

shelly
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LittleMissCee
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LittleMissCee

Female
Number of posts : 2103
Age : 31
Location : WA
Registration date : 2010-01-03

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 1:54 am

I think age is an issue.

Like GR said, if he was 28 and you were 38, it would probably be different, but at 18.. That's really REALLY young.

I have a 19, nearly 20 year old brother.. I'm not that far out of my teens myself... While I'm a lot more mature than a lot of other people my age, mainly because of things I've been through in my life, I know that someone a couple years younger than me would be in no way ready to settle down.

Also like GR said, enjoy it, but don't expect it to last. Sorry.
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gottarhyme
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gottarhyme

Female
Number of posts : 3826
Age : 58
Location : Riverina
Registration date : 2011-02-22

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 1:35 am

Only if he is still in school! And I think you need to say what the age gap is on this thread. The 86 year old woman who married the man in his 60's is not really a good example, as two MATURE consenting adults are just that! Two adults! By age 60, you can choose who ever you want, even if they are 20 years older!! Who cares? They can count each other's wrinkles!

I myself went out with younger men, after I separated, mostly to prove to myself that I 'still had it' but I found them a bit intellectually un-stimulating. The conversation lacked anything of interest to me. But the sex was good! However, I soon tired of inane discussions about cars and bad music. Some generation bridges cannot be crossed. However, they were in their 30's, not teens!

A long term relationship cannot be built on great sex, but a short term fling definitely can. I say 'go girl!' but be prepared for the inevitable, especially as HE is still an immature teen, and you are a woman soon to enter her 30's. Legally you are in the clear. Just!

I find that most men who are interested in me tend to be younger, but I am yet to find someone who has had some life experience! At 18, your young man is still GROWING, physically, as well as mentally. I know, I teach boys his age, and they really don't know what they want!

However, if he was 28, and you were 38, that is entirely different. I would say the same thing to any 28 year old man who wanted a relationship with one of my 18 year old daughters. His fantasy, but is it what is best for the child? And believe me, 18 is STILL a child!

Just my opinion, but you did ask!
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Firie75
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Firie75

Female
Number of posts : 623
Location : NSW
Registration date : 2011-10-01

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PostSubject: Re: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyThu 12 Jan 2012, 12:40 am

I recently nursed an 86 year old lady who's husband was 21 years younger than her. They were married over 30 years....nearly 40 I think by the time the lady passed away. They met while he was delivering the mail as the postman. She was at the time recently divorced from an abusive marriage with three kids (of the 'normal standard' with the husband older than her). They didn't give two hoots what other people thought and believed that true friends will approve and support while the naysayers will disappear and mind their own business eventually.

Age will only be an issue if you let it be. Sometimes 'the one' is not in the same age group as we are and can be younger.
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mamaraptor
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mamaraptor

Female
Number of posts : 249
Location : Melbourne, Australia
Registration date : 2011-11-12

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PostSubject: Is age an issue?   Is age an issue? EmptyWed 11 Jan 2012, 11:24 pm

So as you know I've started seeing someone who is younger than me by ten years. I don't see this as an issue as I have a whole heap of friends and relatives how are happily married with the same age diff. There are some people my age however who are really disapproving. Is age an issue?
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