Getting found out..

I've chosen to remain anonymous on here but have told most of my nearest and dearest. I don't know if hubby has told my in-laws, I told him he could because although I think they'd be quite shocked at me doing something so drastic, they are quietly judgmental and they'd never say anything negative to my face lol.

For me it's about having some control over how many conversations I have to have about it before I actually go through it. I just don't want to go over and over it all the time. I quietly do my research, do my worrying and then just get on with life. Having people asking about it all the time would just be shoving it in my face all the time and make me stress out I reckon. I think I'll be more willing to discuss it afterwards.

zigzag wrote:

Hello Tarnie !

Well it is funny that you say getting the sleeve is brave, because I used to say on this site that people were 'sleever champions' because they are making a serious step and being pro-active toward better health - taking some control with 'the tool'.

You know guys, I think it is not how other people might feel negative towards me having the sleeve because I am pretty darn sure they wouldn't. Also in a lot of ways I do not particularly give a rats. It is a little like have more control and not in revealing everything, just yet. Calmer and less fuss.

R.J. thanks for the link ....I have tried to read every scientific paper I can.

Just got home from night shift  02:47:18 Zzzzzzzz 

Sleever champions I love it!!!
I suppose the control is a good thing too hadn't thought of that.
I guess as I'm out jumping up and down (not at the moment I promise ;-) I'm waiting the required weeks, I strained a fence last weekend and am still hurting from it) and generally making a fool of myself explaining horse stuff to people I've had the questions, and asking if I've been sick as I am looking great but lost weight so fast.

Hello Tarnie !

Well it is funny that you say getting the sleeve is brave, because I used to say on this site that people were 'sleever champions' because they are making a serious step and being pro-active toward better health - taking some control with 'the tool'.

You know guys, I think it is not how other people might feel negative towards me having the sleeve because I am pretty darn sure they wouldn't. Also in a lot of ways I do not particularly give a rats. It is a little like have more control and not in revealing everything, just yet. Calmer and less fuss.

R.J. thanks for the link ....I have tried to read every scientific paper I can.

Just got home from night shift  02:47:18 Zzzzzzzz 

I think we sit in very harsh judgement of ourselves, and we project that on to everyone else. At least, I do.

Willowgirl wrote:

Hi Johno, great that you can put it out there to everyone but I think it is different with men, they are not quite judged as harshly for their weight as we girls are.

Yeah Your probably right. Only you girls would know I guess   

Willowgirl wrote:

Hi Johno, great that you can put it out there to everyone but I think it is different with men, they are not quite judged as harshly for their weight as we girls are.

By men?  Or by other women?

Hi Johno, great that you can put it out there to everyone but I think it is different with men, they are not quite judged as harshly for their weight as we girls are.

I have told everyone, I even put it on Facebook. I have not received 1 negative comment from anyone at work or on FB, infact everyone has been great and very supportive to me. 

I think you guys would suprised how much support your families, friends, and work mates would be.
I hope anyway

   

Love that Zig Zag!

I'm proud to have had it done, all of us have had to be so brave to do this.

But then I work with awesome not judgemental people and I'm in the country, a wee bit of a nicer attitude (I've had anyway), than in town.

If people ask I tell them.
And if someone tells me I've taken the easy way out, I ask them if they would like to go get the stomach chopped up etc and explain the hard work we have to continue.

I think of the time when I was looking for help, so if my story helps one person.

We all have to do what we need to do to keep ourselves safe and free from judgement.

But those that judge it is a reflection on them on, not me.
And I am in the public eye as a judge etc so it has been noticed big time already as im 2 weeks post op.

Gosh you were quick to answer Wenchiepooh !!

Yes I hope I am like you as well ( got everything crossed ).  Hope the Sleever gods will bestow little pain and feeling yuk, and super sleeve that helps me obtain my health goals.
 May this be so for all sleevers!
  
zigzag

zigzag, obviously everyone is different.. 

I'll be person... L.. (L for Lizzy!)

I bounced back with no major drama at all. Home from hospital two days post op, driving after a week, back at work two weeks post op.

Hi sleevers,


I wrote about this earlier on a different page. WHO TO TELL AND NOT TO TELL

 I have not told my work what I am having in my letter requesting leave for 3 weeks for op and recovery,  with option of coming back 3 days a week at first and said I do not want to discuss particulars. By law they are not required to know. I want my right to privacy.  I have let them believe it is hernias being repaired...have not corrected their assumption.....


 Have only told my mum and dad as they have been very concerned I am going to die...and they are sworn to secrecy.  I also told them NOT to have unrealistic expectations because it will have negative impact on me. My parents are very fatso-phobic.  

And not told BFF of 35 years or my sister.  Sometimes people accidently might let it slip too ....and then there is facebook...aagghh  if it got on there it is foreveeeeer, regardless of the restrictions we place - no guarantees.
 

Not sure they would twig anyway because I have lost weight before....but can never keep it off permanently. They will think 'here she goes again...but she'll put it on again by 2 to 3 years later..'


WHERE IN HERE CAN I FIND SLEEVERS RECOVERY TIMES?

You know..person X bouncing off the walls in 2 weeks....person Y needed a month to get back to work etc   person Z went back to work  but had nausea for 8 weeks  ???? What is the average ?

Anyway Ta Ta for now....need some beauty sleep Zzzzzz

zigzag

We don't go out to restaurants and I am a stay at home Mum so I don't have to eat with people other than my family very much at all. I figure the first time people will notice my eating will be at Christmas time and we have a smorgasboard so it shouldn't be too bad then. Unless someone actually comes out and asks me flat out I will not be saying anything about it. If that happens I will be saying I am seeing a Dietician and Counsellor and leave it at that. I love the old 'ladies operation' Nini, I have used it before and it works like a charm as people really don't want to go there...lol
Having said that, the Hernia is a good idea too.

I didn't tell anyone at work until the day I left for my sick leave. Not because I was ashamed but because I was already nervous and stressed, so I didn't want everyone asking the same questions over and over again. I wasn't concerned about what they thought. I knew that the grape vine would spread the word so that it wasn't the latest news when I got back. When I first started here I had an Avatar of the princess from "Brave" but now I am comfortable enough to have my own mug shot!

If you are wanting to keep it a secret it is probably better to tell people you are having a large hiatus hernia repaired in your stomach. The recovery from this is very similar to the Sleeve and it will explain why your eating habits changed so much. "A ladies operation" doesn't explain why you can't eat and drink at the same time or why you can only eat very small amounts. People aren't stupid, if your eating habits suddenly change dramatically and you are quickly losing weight most people will be guessing you had weight loss surgery of some sort, whether they ask you or not, the gossips will be discussing it. 


cheers Nini

I was the opposite I was ok telling people I feel comfortable with at work..... A few sticky noses I've told I am getting a boob job so that my butt looks smaller lol

Yes Bumbles use the 'I am having a ladies operation' and that will stop any men from asking...lol

Yeah, thats been a sticking point for me, I need to justify taking a heap of personal leave (Im not taking annual leave just to be stuck at home) and not sure what to tell my manager, Ive no issue telling him Im having surgery - but dont really want to say what for (Although Im hoping the answer may make itself obviously apparent down the track!). 

I think I can trust he wont blab, I will tell him its private and if anyone asks just to tell them Im on annual leave, but dont think I want to say why - just might use the whole 'secret womens business' thats usually enough for the males to shut their brains off hahaha

Yeah, I haven't shared personal pic as I haven't told many people I've had the surgery as it's private to me and you don't need to have an account to see the comments or pics on this page either.

One of the ladies I work with has figured out I've had the surgery but because I've used a different excuse she knows I'm not sharing it so has kept her mouth shut (thank god!).  I do think she has told my managers though as I had a few health problems after and they have said a few comments that could mean that but not said anything outright. 
Just because they are my manager, doesn't mean they are entitled to know everything about me!

I did get asked once if I had the band and honestly told them, no I don't :-)  But I know some gf's that do and wow it's sh*t lol!  But I do get reflux at times which could be mistaken for the band so remembering to take my tablets or I do have problems eating.  For some people it makes them hungry.  Not for me, I eat even less and want to vomit up every sip of fluid.

I did at first, and boy.. do I have an absolute DOOZY of a story in regards to that. But now.. I really don't care, when I have pics of me that I like, I'll use them as my profile piccie. Right now though, I'm loving the kitty pics.

Nope, not alone - I dont have my real name or photo on here because im paranoid someone will recognise me! Maybe that will change after the op - will have to wait and see

Does anyone else worry about putting their personal photo on the site as an avatar in case someone you know checks up and finds you here? I am a bit like that as I know a couple of people who may well do that and then it would be all over as far as secrecy goes. I would like to show you all my real face with my chubby cheeks but just a bit reluctant. Am I the only one who worries about anyone being able to come in here and check around?